ah to yes, wider sun. the sam is speaking to you from the online place of the steve man. i am the sam and you will see i am one with nature when i work out with gloves. see me now using the great bowflex machine and my abs are strong. the shredded wheat biscuit has nothing on me.

please to gaze into zombifying eyes of the master sam as i make you weak with my mind

the sam knows of your thought as this image of the beth woman takes your mind - and i tell you here your thought is weak and my word to you is no. the sam has spoken.

here you are looking at the beth woman as i have laid her in a bather's tub and filled it with seventeen bags of cheese puffs. much in the ways as i am disciplined in exercise i too hold dominion over the beth woman and the cheese puffs that surround her. i shall consume them both and you will know me as the sam who does so. and i will one day grip my computer and force it to be in the online. and my will enters you from the world of the online. and you will become like a zombie in my world of the online.

and here you see as i have shown you my dominion over cheese puffs! look to the ways i humiliate them! i have drowned them in liquor - so unfit to be enraptured by my stomach - i hurl them onto the pavement liquor and all. then i lie back and laugh to myself! ha ha ha! they should be as a green egg. they should be as a ham. now they are befouled. and i am the sam who is speaking to you from the online place of the steve man.

see now the work of the sam as cheese puffs lay sobbing in their own pity and i fall back in laughter at their demise. they are as you - but a mindless puff - and are made weak by the power of the sam.